puller(ticdc): fix wrong update splitting behavior after table scheduling (#11296)

[ti-chi-bot]

This is an automated cherry-pick of #11296

What problem does this PR solve?

Issue Number: close #11219

What is changed and how it works?

1. There are two cdc nodes A and B, and B start before A, that is thresholdTSB < thresholdTSA;
2. The sync task of table t is first on A;
3. Table t has an update event which commitTS is smaller than thresholdTSA and larger than thresholdTSB. So the update event is split to a delete event and an insert event on node A;
4. But the delete event and insert event cannot be send to the downstream in an atomic way. So if after the delete event is send to downstream and before the insert event being send, the table sync task is scheduling to node B, the update event are received by node B again;
5. The update event is not split by node B because its commitTS is larger than the thresholdTSB, and node B just send an update sql to downstream which cause data inconsistency;

And there is also another thing to notice that after scheduling, node B will send some events to downstream which are already send by node A; So node B must send these events in an idempotent way;
Previously, this is handled by getting a replicateTS in sink module when sink starts and split these events which commitTS is smaller than replicateTS. But this mechanism is also removed in #11030. So we need to handle this case in puller too.

In this pr, instead of maintaining a separate thresholdTS in sourcemanager, we try to get the replicateTS from sink when puller need to check whether to split the update event.
And since puller module starts working before sink module, so we give replicateTS a default value MAXUInt64 which means to split all update events. After sink starts working, replicateTS will be set to the correct value.

The last thing to notice, when sink restarts due to some error, after restart, the sink may send some events downstream which are already send before restart. These events also need be send in an idempotent way. But these events are already in sorter, so just restart sink cannot accomplish this goal. So we forbid restarting sink in this pr and just restart the changefeed when meet error.

Check List

Tests

• Manual test (add detailed scripts or steps below)

1. deploy a cluster with three cdc nodes;
2. kill all nodes occasionally while running workload and check whether the data is consistent;

Questions

Will it cause performance regression or break compatibility?

Do you need to update user documentation, design documentation or monitoring documentation?

Release note

None

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[lidezhu]

Already fixed in #11283