Refactor to use less or no static properties

[omitobi]

Maybe by using something like this so that if statement can remain non-static but callable statically?

public static function __callStatic($method, $parameters)
{
    if($method === 'if' and !self::ifCalled) {
        return (new static)->$method(...$parameters);
    }
}

Reviewable under the spec of best practices and performance.