Common dependencies are hard to reuse

[troshko111]

Description of the problem / feature request:

Bazel UX for dealing with common dependencies is less than ideal at the moment, one needs to:

• Define a project_dependencies-like function accepting a ton of omit_xxx flags deciding whether to load a particular sub-dependency or not (in case one is available already).
• Rely on the name match for common dependencies (aka hope the dependency you're adding has googletest as com_google_googletest, not com_googletest or com_google_google_test or googletest (and this is a simple case).
• Add explicit support for cmake_external dependency sharing (these require //external:<name> syntax so need to be select-ed via Bazel config settings.

Feature requests: what underlying problem are you trying to solve with this feature?

Simplify the process and make it less error-prone, one idea I had was to allow declaring a map like

{
    "rapidjson": "@com_github_tencent_rapidjson//:rapidjson",
    "curl": "//external:curl"
}

so then instead of bool flags one can write

deps = [
               workspace_deps["rapidjson"],
               workspace_deps["curl"],
           ]

not having to rely on string matching and defining stuff like

config_setting(
    name = "zlib_via_cmake",
    values = {"define": "zlib_via_cmake=enabled"},
)

and

select({
        "//conditions:default": [
            "@net_zlib//:zlib",
        ],
        "@spectator//:zlib_via_cmake": [
            "//external:zlib",
        ],

This was originally encountered when submoduling Envoy and sharing dependencies between Envoy's and other submodules, see discussion at envoyproxy/envoy#8141 which has some examples. Related to #2757.

Example of a dependency trying to be a good Bazel citizen https://github.com/Netflix/spectator-cpp/blob/master/BUILD

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